Absent –fighting for Fatherhood

I’m watching the film Absent. It is really really good. It features James Hetfield from Metallica, which is how I came across it, but the boxing legend Jonny Tapia is also in it.

“The truth is I’ve got a broken heart. And I don’t think it’s going to be fixed. And the reason why I tell you is because I want to help others”. Jonny Tapia Boxing champ.

“Hundreds of thousands of adoring fans and million dollar pay checks did not fill the void left by his parents’ deaths so he turns to drugs” Narrator

“I just wanted someone to say that I’m going to make it. I don’t have to do those crazy stuff. I don’t have to shoot nobody or stab nobody. I’ve been doing everything in the wrong way. And I’m tired. I’m really beat down.  I am missing love and affection. Will I ever get it. I don’t know” Jonny Tapia


He said he would trade all of his belts for love and affection “in a heart beat”.


Towards the end of the film, Jonny Tapia cheers on his son in his first professional fight. He loses. What does Jonny say to him?

“I love you and I’m proud of you”.


Jonny’s ability to express the essence of true Fatherhood to his son is his greatest victory of all.




There are other powerful testimonies from abandoned daughters in the film:


“The very first time that he didn’t fight for me I knew I wasn’t worth it. And if the one person who is supposed to want to be there for me isn’t, then why would someone else?”.


Another lady who was abused and abandoned by her father was asked: “If you could talk to yourself when you were a little girl, if you were sitting right next to her, what would you say?”


“I would tell her not to search for her daddy’s love everywhere. And that she has to somehow just believe that people love her. And that she is beautiful.”



Then we get to the James Hetfield bit…


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